Bethany Joy Lenz Speaks Out About Marriage to Cult Leader’s Son Calling His Father

When Bethany Joy Lenz she was a member of The Big House Family, married the son of a cult leader and got involved in an unintended affair.

“We had a lot in common. There wasn’t a lot of intellectual stimulation,” said Lenz, 43, during an interview on the “Call Her Daddy” podcast, which aired Wednesday, October 16. “I ran out of options. … It turned out to be this kind of orchestrated situation.”

While Lenz admitted that the relationship with her unnamed ex-husband – referred to as “QB” in her upcoming memoir, Dinner for Vampires — “it was easy and playful,” the desire to sleep with him was not there.

“I had a crazy sex drive,” they said One Tree Hill star is allowed on the podcast. “It’s amazing that I didn’t sleep until I got married.”

However, because she did not feel “connected” to her husband on that level, drastic measures were taken. Lenz and his ex are now on a sex program, something that has affected their relationship even after the divorce. (Lenz shares daughter Rosie, born in 2011, with her ex-husband.)

“I don’t think that had anything to do with saving myself from marriage,” he explained. “It just happened that I married the wrong person.”

In the episode, Lenz detailed his 10 years on The Big House Family, which is the focus of his upcoming book, which will be released on Tuesday, October 22. Keep scrolling to read Lenz’s “Call Her Daddy” interview revelations. :

His Feelings About Sex

Lenz admitted that he had a “difficult” understanding of sex because of his marriage.

“I thought that if I save myself from marriage, then the promise is amazing sex and deep intimacy and nothing is always good,” explains Lenz. But she did not “feel very connected” to her husband.

Schedule

To combat her “impassioned” feelings about sleeping with her husband, the former couple was put on a sex program by cult leaders. Lenz was in a long-distance relationship at the time of filming One Tree Hill in North Carolina.

“I didn’t have this attraction, I didn’t have the passion,” she said, noting that she believed it was her “duty” as a wife to have sex with her husband.

“I take marriage seriously, and I made a promise before God,” he recalled. “This is something I really want to figure out how to make it work. So, I hated it, but I was like, okay, if this is what I have to do.”

However, her “stomach fell out” every time her husband came to town.

The Impact on His Relationships

The sex program in her marriage caused “PTSD” with other boyfriends, Lenz admitted. If she had to pick up men at the airport, she was quickly brought back to the mindset of having “this schedule of sex for the next two weeks or three weeks or whatever.”

Feelings About Him Ex

It seemed that Lenz had no bad blood towards her ex-husband – who grew up in the cult of the Big House Family.

“The poor man, he has never been shot, he was raised by this thug. He got married to a girl who didn’t deserve him,” he said. “He did everything he could. You’ve been fed all these lies about men and machismo and heroes and all this s—. … It was just chaos all around.”

Using ‘One Tree Hill’ as an Escape

During difficult times in her marriage, Lenz played Haley James Scott – who has a good relationship with husband Nathan Scott (James Lafferty) — so he “leaned in” to that, but “at times when the cameras were rolling.”

She and Lafferty had a “totally professional relationship” off screen, which was a blessing.

“I always saw him in real life as a brotherly man and a good man,” he said of his former client. “We never crossed that line, and I never worried about having feelings, as that would be really difficult.”

Touching His Work

Lenz would kiss Lafferty on screen for them One Tree Hill roles – and her ex-husband “hated.”

“He also wanted me to stop acting, to stop playing with other boys,” he said.

Starting a Family

“For a long time,” Lenz did not want to have children because he was “miserable” in marriage. However, they eventually got to a “happy enough” place where he was ready to take the next step.

“I wanted a child. I always wanted a child. I always wanted to be a mother,” she said. “I didn’t want to do it when I was full of emotional trauma. That took about six years to get to that point.”